The Self-Proclaimed Hero
by 0nesh0t
Summary: The Self-Proclaimed Hero just wanted a good fight. What will happen when he joins the hero association? Will he finally find the threat he's been looking for or will he just find somebody else to fight for. (OC x Tatsumaki)
1. Volume 1

It was a normal day by all standards. The sun was out, the breeze was cool, the streets filled with people looking for sales on their favorite products. These are all thing that humans have grown accustomed to, to the point where it's almost a daily routine. Yes, indeed it was a normal day.

A human living in a different reality might have thought that. The truth was, this was every citizen's lucky day. Monsters, or mysterious beings showed up every other day that heroes weren't on patrol. And even if they were, there was a good chance a demon-level threat would show and proceed to pummel whatever misfortunate B-Class hero it could get its hands on. Most people wouldn't go through the training required to be a hero. Most people were too scared that they'd be risking their lives for a job that didn't even repay them that well unless they squirmed their way into the upper echelons of the Hero Association.

And most people were right, the association fronted an image of justice and fairness. They claimed they would dismantle any threat. Regardless, everyone knew the association for the truly corrupt business they were. Using unique powers for the sake of money? To some, this would be the real injustice, not whatever villain or monster that shows up. Even so, thousands of kids looked up to an assortment of different heroes, which included the handsome and popular Amai Mask, the short-tempered Terrible Tornado, the mysterious scientist Bofoi, and the child prodigy Child Emperor.

They all wanted to be one of the heroes that the world could one day idolize and love. That's how it was for Saitama, and the main fuel for his "extreme" workout regimen of a 10-kilometer run every day, 100 sit ups, 100 pushups, and 100 squats. That's what may have worked for him, but this story isn't only centered around the overly-powerful character. This story focuses on a different overly-powerful character. One that aspires to be a hero as well but doesn't care about the fame or money that goes with it, like our favorite hero dressed in yellow. One that also seeks for the thrill of an exciting fight. And his name is…

RING RING RING

The alarm rang, feeling louder than all the other days. It probably felt like that because he drank too much the night before. In fact, he had completely forgotten what his name was, before remembering he didn't really have a name. His 'company' knew him as Blank, they were never interested in his name or his background or wherever he came from, they only saw potential in him. Potential that could be used to conquer the world. Potential to be the strongest man the Earth has ever seen. He had always seen the potential in himself, but honestly, he just wanted to save lives and return home. Only recently, he had found a new goal. Find a worthy opponent. What his group told him was true, he was the strongest man on the Earth. Unless there was some abnormally strong hero out there.

/

Looking around the store while others looked at him with estranged eyes, to which he was no stranger to, he found a great sale. 65% off on the crabs! Initially crabs were already cheap and easy to find and fish for, but a sale never hurt anyone. Picking up a few packages, he was having an inner debate whether to have Sukiyaki with crab or Udon and save the crab for a later time. By the time he got to the front of the grocery line, he had made up his mind.

"482 yen, please."

Placing down 500 yen, the cashier extended her hand to get it when suddenly the ground beneath them started to violently shake. "Oh, hold on" the strangely dressed man told her, "I have 82 yen." Searching for the 82 yen, he noticed everyone was leaving the store in a panicked hurry. "Hm, guess I'll just leave the money here then" he thought. Before he could set the 82 yen down, a humungous object tore off half of the store's exterior and interior. Looking up, the bald man went to do his job. He jumped up probably about 300 meters.

Looking on as the giant wiped out half the city with a simple swing of his hand, he could be easily mistaken for an assisting assailant. "YES! That's right, scatter like rats! What do you think brother?" a man who seemed like a scientist yelled from the giant's other shoulder. Before the scientist's brother could reply, a voice cut them off. "Yeah, how's it feel being the strongest?" Searching for the source of the sound, the scientist exclaimed, "What?! There's someone on your shoulder!"

"Put on some pants."

That seemed to be the last straw for the mad scientist, "That guy on your shoulder! Kill him!" Registering his words, the titanic humanoid picked up his right hand and swatted his left shoulder. Looking at his palm to see the remnants of the random intruder, he instead was greeted by the blood and lab coat of what he could only assume to be his brother. Some time passed, then he realized what just happened. "NII-SAN!" the colossus screamed, dragging out the ending syllable of the words. "How did this happen?! I just wanted to be strong! And I finally am the strongest man, but…" his voice fading after looking at the smiling man on his other shoulder. "I don't know who you are, but it's your fault my brother is dead!" Grabbing the man and slamming him into a building, he followed it up by throwing thousands of blows onto the ground where he threw the man. "Behold! Our brotherly power!" he thought as he continued to pound on the probably lifeless corpse of the cause of his current problems.

_After sending one last punch to be sure, he was content with the damage he had_ done. In that moment of anger, he had forgotten about the sadness that plagued him a few seconds previously. He had killed his brother because of this man? No, it was a result of them getting too power hungry. And why, why were they so greedy seeking power? Balling up his fist in a triumphant manner, a tear let itself out of his eye. _I'm the strongest. So, what if I am? I feel…empty._

Not giving him the time of day, the hero who donned a yellow suit, red gloves, and a bald head jumped out of the newly created crater. "Right?" Preparing to punch him, he gave out his few last words of the evening, "Having overwhelming strength is…pretty boring." Watching the behemoth of a man freefall onto the city, he felt a sense of dread that he'd be responsible for any casualties. "Oops."

His walk home was a normal one. Well until this monster showed up. "Vroom, vroom?" the monster seemed to ask. "No sense hiding if you saw me. I'm Super Custom Y0649z MK II! I love building custom cars so much!" The rest of his speech was blocked out by the man's inner thoughts. Had he really lost something that was essential to a human being? Well probably not, or else he'd just be a monster in a human's skin. He wanted the exhilaration that he once felt when fighting a threatening monster.

"And what's your name?" The bald man looked up. "It's Saitama, a hero for fun." Feeling confident he could take on the silly "hero for fun" the monster raised his hands preparing to kill Saitama. As always, the hero ended it with one punch.

He let out a sigh. "Guess I'll have the Sukiyaki with crab."

/

Although she took pride in her power, and her ranking, she was still annoyed when the association gave her the task of cleaning up small fry like this. Who cares if this mysterious being defeated Smile Man and Lightning Max, they were merely low ranked A-Class heroes. Couldn't they call a different S-Class? She sped up her flight, she didn't want to waste any time.

"Oh? What's this?" the purple monster asked himself. Walking up to the crying little girl, his hand grew and snapped at the girl extremely quickly. Instead of erasing the girl from existence as he had been doing thus far, he instead had his hand bounce off. "Hm? Some sort of shield?" He punched the shield again, this time having his fist stopped midair completely. Looking up in the air, he spotted a little girl. Was she lost too? "Hey child, is this your doing?" the monster asked pointing at his fist. "Wha-who're you calling a child you ugly purple freak! I'm S Class, Rank One, Terrible Tornado! You know?! I'm THE Tornado!" The purple monster glanced at her. "Nope, who are you? I didn't know children like you liked playing fantasy so mu-"he was cut off by a barrage of semi-destroyed buildings aimed for him. "Seriously, who did he think he was?!"

Sensing that he was probably still alive, she kept on guard. She lifted the actual little girl to a safer location after instructing her to find her parents. This monster deserved a good thrashing, she refused to just twist him to death. On cue with her thought, a purple hand lounged for her which was easily blocked by her telepathic shield. Being a human, she obviously wasn't very durable, her shield was an entirely different story. "Is that all you have to show me?" she asked the creature with a disappointed face. "Ugh, to think I have to actually put effort into exterminating a weakling like you" he began as his muscles contorted into different sizes which would embarrass the likes of her muscle-headed S-Class allies. "Same goes for me, you're pretty weak yourself you know." Although she was quite the egomaniac, she deserved every bit of it. After all, no other esper in the world could compare to her. But monsters, there were always bigger fish in the ocean of endless fish, none of them were anything special.

Lost in her train of thought, a handful of orbs hit her shield blasting into smoke and obscuring her view. This didn't incite any panic in the Rank 2 hero. She looked around to try to see where the mysterious being was. She hated to admit but the orbs were extremely strong, nearly causing a crack in her shield. Quicker than she could react, the monster that identified itself as vaccine man appeared in front of her using both arms to try to break through her shield. She scoffed at the attempt. Picking up rocks that could be mistaken for asteroids, she stockpiled it onto her attacker, "how boring" she thought.

CRASH! The rocks collapsed onto Tatsumaki. However, that wasn't what shocked the Terrible Tornado. Her shield was broken in a combined effort of Vaccine Man and the rocks. She looked up to see if perhaps the mysterious being had been caught underneath all the rubble and concrete. Once again, quicker than she could react, she was punched by the monster. Regret filled her mind as she wished she just finished him off when he was in his weaker state. She put up a weaker shield in replacement, but even she could tell it wouldn't last long enough for reinforcements to arrive. In her eyes, she was as good as dead. Seeing the last vision of Fubuki, the feeling of helplessness flooded her brain. She was unaware of her crying. All the whilst civilians looked on from afar in horror. The rank 2 hero was getting treated like what everyone thought she was. They, along with her began to feel helpless. "Help!" they managed to scream while scattering away.

/

After reading the newspaper, Blank found out that some blonde guy who called himself King defeated the giant that terrorized B-City and D-City. Perhaps he was the man who could challenge him. His phone went off, he picked up to see the contact 'Satsujin', one of the members of his group. He was also his student after seeing how unbelievably strong Blank was. Blank reluctantly agreed to teach him, besides Satsujin always ended fights bloodied, not because he was injured but rather because he liked blitzing the opponent and sticking his arm through whatever vital point they had. It was a troublesome technique. "Blank-Sensei, I believe you would want to look at the news. It seems there's a threat that's giving the S-Class Rank One Terrible Tornado trouble. It is best you stop the situation."

Following his disciple's advice, he opened the news channel on the television. After watching a portion of the fight, he turned off the T.V with a sigh. He always wanted to fight Tatsumaki, she couldn't die now. Grabbing his katana, his cape, and his suit, he mumbled under his breath, "Guess I'll go."

/

The fight was over, she couldn't win. Her cockiness got the best of her. She laid on the ground as result of the fight that had just occurred. "It seems you were but a little girl." Usually, she'd find the will to give a snarky comeback, but her throat was tightened restricting her from talking. She remembered all those good times she had with Fubuki and her childhood friend. Her only dying wish at this point of time was that she could see them again. Fubuki being her dear little sister, and the friend being her and Fubuki's only companion growing up. He was kidnapped one day, and they never saw him again.

She saw all the visions in one quick second that felt like an eternity. Vaccine Man's arm which was raised descended quickly onto her. Prepared for the release of death, Tatsumaki closed her eyes. And then she felt lighter. She also felt the hands of another human. She opened her eyes to see a man with black hair who donned a white cape and had a sheathed sword. She was being carried in a bridal style to which she would protest if it were anyone else, but something about him felt…comforting. The feeling was familiar. The words of the purple monster brought her back to reality. "Who are you?" Her savior cracked a smile, "I'm the unofficial hero Blank. More importantly, you defeated the Rank 1 S-Class hero. Don't disappoint me in this fight." He threw a punch at the "self-proclaimed" hero. "So, you can dodge me at this form … you're clearly different from the girl." The man, who she now knew as Blank gently put her down on the ground.

A brilliant flash appeared down the middle of Vaccine Man. Tatsumaki's jaw dropped, even if only slightly. The monster who threw her around was cut cleanly in two. She never even saw Blank's sword get unsheathed. He was obvious S-Class talent, he could use a sword more efficiently than Lightspeed Flash and Atomic Samurai, which was impressive to say the least.

/

"But… but this time, it looked like the monster was going to be strong… DAMNITTTTTTT! I wasn't even serious… I just wanted to gauge his strength!"

In the corner of his eye, he caught the Terrible Tornado staring at him. What was up with her? She looked familiar. Probably all the times he'd seen her on the news. "Hey, Tornado, should I send you to the association or the hospital?" Not replying, she simply pointed to the direction of the hospital. He picked her up, surprised by how petite she truly was in person. He expected her to be at least a few inches taller than what he'd seen on T.V. They didn't talk on the way to the hospital. Blank tried to be careful with her body, she was badly injured after all.

Having made half the distance to the hospital, the roar of newscasters and an audience of people swarmed around Tatsumaki and the self-proclaimed hero. "Mister! Is it true you defeated the purple mysterious being?!" He looked at how large the audience was. If he said yes, then he'd be sought after by the Hero Association which would be no fun. "Uh… no, Tornado defeated it." He felt Tatsumaki facepalm, it was obvious he was lying. Even through his obvious bluff, several eye witnesses testified for his strength. Sure, it was nice to get some recognition, but this was overkill. "Could you guys move out of the way, I need to get her to the hospital." On demand, the audience moved out of the way with nothing but praise for the self-proclaimed hero.

…

Finally, they made it to the hospital. It took much longer than usual because he had to make sure not to accidentally kill her. Opening the doors, the hospital staff gasped. The S-Class Rank One Hero Tornado being held by another person? It should've been impossible. He handed her body to a doctor. "I'll cover he expenses" he sighed. "How much?" The doctor asked his assistant to estimate the cost. "It would be about 22 million yen." Looking at him with a grim expression, then at Tatsumaki with a face like, 'You better pay me back', he handed him his entire wallet, and then his card, and then his watch, and then some. Opening the exit door, Tatsumaki shouted out his name. Her face was beet red. "Tha-thanks…" He wouldn't mention it to anyone, but she was pretty cute when thanking him. "No problem." And with that, he left, leaving the newscasters and hospital staff members in awe

…

**SELF-PROCLAIMED HERO SHOWS UP AND SAVES S-CLASS RANK 1 HERO?!**

It was troublesome, all the magazines that went around with that title. His phone blew up. Literally. His 'disciple' Satsujin already called him 30 times a day at least. And with T.V channels giving exposure to the recent event, he was being called in for interviews and sought out by Hero Association workers. After paying the fine for Tatsumaki, he was left with a negative bank balance. "Great…back to the fast food place" he thought to himself.


	2. Volume 2

Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story, except for the OC's.

Sleep, a place where humans can go to enjoy peacefulness, tranquility, and silence. For many, it's a safe haven to escape from the horrors of the real world. Of course, this isn't how it is for everyone. One person who certainly doesn't like sleep, is the hero this story is centered around. Blank. The reason for his hatred of sleep is simply, he gets visited by the same dream every night. What happens in these dreams is that-

BAM!

Blank awoke to a loud sound coming from outside his apartment complex. Looking around, he instantly knew what was going to happen. It didn't matter though, it always gave him a rush, and perhaps this time it'd be real. Like every-time before in this dream, a large brown hand shot through his wall gripping his head. Shoving it off him, he dove to grab his katana and punched exited his apartment through a hole that had just been created. Once he got outside, the ground erupted revealing tens of hundreds of brown beings decorated with varying characteristics. Even though he'd been through this dream thousands of times, he decided to play along with it.

"What the hell are you?"

"_What _am I? That's rude, we are the true earthlings. I believe you call us Subterraneans. Suffering from overpopulation, we have decided to take over the surface for ourselves. I understand there are many surface dwellers, and you are in our way. Since our invasion had begun, we've killed over 70% of the surface dwellers. We've decided to eradicate you all and no one had survived a single one of our attacks except for you."

Smirking, Blank drew his sword. "It's been a while since I've faced against such worthy oppenents, Subterraneans!"

"We are earthlings!" yelled the alien-like creature as he brought his fist down in hopes of executing the surface dweller. Side-stepping the subterranean's attack, Blank punched the creature with a fraction of his full force, sending shock waves that were felt by the brethren of the defeated monster. After the silence settled, the body exploded into a pool of blood. Letting out surprised gasps, 5 of them stepped up to fight. "Die!" they screamed in unison as they jumped onto Blank. As if he was drawing, he threw out strokes of his blade, movements that could only look so natural if someone had been practicing wielding the katana all their life. The previously intact bodies of the alien creatures were diced instantaneously into minced meat.

Jumping on the faces of the subterraneans, caving some of their heads in, Blank hopped high into the air from one location to the next, only to meet more of the subterraneans chasing him. Weaving through their multiple attempts to land a hit on him, he found himself trapped under four separate subterraneans having to hold up his arms as a shield. The road that they were on collapsed. Once it fell, Blank took the opportunity to sweep them off their feet. Punching one body into the others, more and more of the creatures appeared before the self-proclaimed hero. Using his sword to slice through some, and then punching the others, the subterraneans were falling left, right, and center. After kicking the body of one subterranean into the other, a much bigger one appeared before him, punching Blank and in turn causing a huge explosion to occur.

It was over. As if the huge fires raging on weren't enough proof, the body of the surface dweller couldn't be found anywhere. "What was that surface dweller?" one asked to another.

A man walked out of the flames revealing bloody injuries and multiple bruises. "I'm…the hero who's going to save the world. I do not lose! And the surface… is under my protection!"

Scoffing, one of the bigger subterraneans' replied, "Big talk for a race of vermin!" Thousands of more subterraneans attacked Blank. Jumping up in the air and delivering a punch at his full force, the effects of his punch sent all his attackers flying in different directions. Still with all his momentum, Blank jumped towards the bigger versions of the creatures he had just fought. Delivering an uppercut, then slicing one in half, the feelings of a real fight came pouring back to him. Before another subterranean could get its chance to hit Blank, a huge object fell, obstructing his view. Destroying the object, Blank surprised him as he jumped up and delivered a heavy kick to his jaw. Turning around, a subterranean had unsuspectingly punched him. Not faltering, however, Blank delivered his own punch back, disabling the subterranean's arm, followed up by another one to kill.

Still in the air, two of what seemed to be the last of the monsters suspended him as he was located between their two fists. Holding a defensive position, Blank then released his arms from the position which sent a force strong enough to make the two giants' fall. Driving his fist through the both of their bodies, it was over. The fight for survival, and Blank had come out on top. He had win, but it wasn't easy. The dream personified every reason why he had ever wanted to be a hero. The tough fights, the justice, the idea of saving the world from doom. But it wasn't over. Of course, it never was. Hearing a crack in the ground, and investigating the sound's origin, an enormous version of the foes he had just been fighting emerged. One that carried sword with him as well.

"I see you have been taking good care of my children. Very well then, I, the Subterranean King will face you!"

Smiling, for he had been waiting for this moment, he accepted the challenge to fight. Running forwards, he tightened the grip on the hilt of his sword. Screaming as he launched into the air, only one thing happened. The king… just exploded. He exploded, letting out his blue innards and leaking blue blood. Blank hadn't done this, he hadn't even touched him yet. This was unexpected, of all the times he ever had this dream, that had never happened before. Looking past the king's body, he could make out the silhouette of a bald man, wearing yellow and red, with a white cape like Blank's own cape. The man was frustrated. "Not again… it just took one punch again! DAMNITTTTTT!"

RING RING

Awakening to the loud noise of his alarm clock, Blank looked over to his wall. Of course, it was a dream. But who was that man? And if he existed…he'd certainly be a hell of a fight.

/

"What could be the cause of the massive mosquito outbreak this year? We ask Mr. Kafetch, an expert on the subject who has written several books on the subject."

"Thank you for having me! Let me get straight to the point. These mosquitoes belong to an entirely new species; therefore, I know nothing about them."

"Get out!" the reporter instructed him in a harsh tone. Coughing to regain his composure, the reporter shows the cities that are going to be hit hardest by the mosquito outbreak

"Man, City Z's in their path. Now we've got a mosquito outbreak?"

Stepping outside to water his cactus, the news continued, "A large swarm of mosquitos has been sighted in City Z. Mummified remains of attacked farm animals have also been found. If you encounter a swarm of mosquitos, flee immediately." Oblivious to the latest revelation, Saitama was confronted by a single mosquito which landed on his hand. Getting his hand in position, he then brought it down with great force, slapping his other hand. Lifting his palm up, the little mosquito flew out unscathed by the attack. Attempting to catch it in the air, and failing, the mosquito eventually finds itself on Saitama's face. Slapping his own face to no avail, Saitama stands up ready to destroy the miniature insect. Traveling at supersonic speeds, one would think that Saitama was teleporting. Neighbors looking outside their apartment windows would swear that they saw a bald man flying, trying to swat a bug.

/

"This is an emergency evacuation warning. Threat Level: Demon." The PA system announced. Littered on the streets were the dry corpses of birds. A certain cyborg looked at the bird, then looked to the still-gathering swarm of mosquitoes. "I repeat, no City Z resident is to go outside." Focusing on the swarm of pests, the young cyborg said to himself, "Acquiring target."

/

The loud noises of glasses being shattered weren't heard by anyone, mostly because they were all inside their houses. Carrying a bag full of stolen goods, the robber dressed in black scoffed at the warning. "Thanks to all the warnings, no one's out right now. Like someone's gonna die from a mosquito bite. What's losing a little blood if I get all of this?" Distracted with the value of all that he stole, a strong wind blew his hat off, even shaking him up a little. "The wind?" the man asked himself looking back. In front of him, millions of little bugs were gathering up, preparing to give themselves a meal. First engulfing his legs, the robber let out a surprised gasp. "What the?" That was all he could mutter out before his entire body was devoured.

"Incinerate" a voice came from behind. The voice was followed by great red flames burning all in front of him. With the mosquitos gone, only the half alive corpse of the man remained. Only the few single-digited survivors of the swarm flew back into the air. The cyborg tracked them with his eyes. It seemed they returned to a much bigger, conscious swarm. Unloading whatever juices they had for their queen, her moans could be heard from inside the swarm. Once dispersed, a girl with insect like features was revealed. "Come on, you guys. That was barely anything" She complained to her insect servants. "Go get some more for me" she demanded.

"Target acquired" the cyborg said before fire shot out of the palm of his hand. Barely being able to react to it, the girl turned around eliminating the fires with the waves being created by her wings. "I see. You make them suck the blood then take it all for yourself" the cyborg analyzed staring at the almost dead robber. "You must be controlling the mosquitos via some sort of signal. That would explain their mysterious behavior. So, if I were to get rid of you, the leader, would the swarm stop too?" Giving a chuckle as a response, the woman instructed her slaves, "Our next meal is here, milk him dry!"

As the bugs gathered around the man, another burst of fire came out, obliterating her insect slaves. "I am about to eliminate you. Stay where you are."

Needing another moment to take in everything, she replied "You? Eliminate me? You can try!"

Throwing out another bunch of flames, the cyborg dashed up through the building to the overgrown mosquito's location. Giving a punch, and missing it, he gets punished by a swift counterattack that disorients him, and another attack which he blocks. Readying for another attempt to take down the woman, the blonde cyborg accelerates to a different position. Jumping at a much faster speed, the Mosquito Girl blocks meets his punch with her claw and using her other claw to send him spiraling downwards. Balancing himself, the robotic being heats up his palm once again. "Incinerate." Dodging the straight line of his attack, Mosquito Girl eventually got close enough to take an arm from her opponent. "Maybe a leg next?" she mocks. Suddenly dragged down, she looks at her legs to find they'd been ripped off. "Wait… where are my legs?" Answering her, the blonde cyborg throws her legs onto the ground.

Flying away to recuperate, a ball of fire greets her in the air. "Impossible. You cannot escape me." The cyborg announces. By then, mosquito girl had already flown up too high in the sky for any of his attacks to be of effectiveness. "What's with that guy? He's gonna get me if I don't do something." She states in a nonchalant manner. Licking her lips, she prepared for another plan. "The townspeople may be hiding, but there are plenty of animals around. Come little ones! Empty all of your blood into me!" Recognizing the origin of the mosquito meetup, the cyborg shows to the location. "So many. If she's been collecting blood from the whole town and beyond, it may not be simply a food source for her. I should stop this as soon as possible" he thinks as he prepares another incinerating attack.

/

Saitama was over it. What was up with this mosquito? It was faster than him and had escaped everything he threw at it. It was to the point where he chased the bug out onto the street. "Get back here damnit!" he shouted grabbing the attention of someone he didn't know was there. "You and I aren't done yet!" Veins about to pop could be spotted at the top of his head. While speaking, the mosquito entered his mouth. "It's in my mouth! Pft, pft! You little- huh?" He looked up to a weird sight. A human with shiny armor and a big black ball of things that were moving. "What's that squirming over there? It's… mosquitoes?!" If he couldn't deal with one, how could he have dealt with the millions that were bunched up? "You over there" the man said to Saitama "Evacuate now, that swarm is conscious. If it senses you, it will attack you immediately." Feeling uneasy, Saitama asked, "Seriously? That's bad. I gotta get- "the high-pitched laughter of Mosquito Girl cut him off.

Saitama stood there as the millions of mosquitoes descended upon City-Z, destroying buildings and causing chaos. In a second, though, the other man emitted flames from his hands once again, scorching all the bugs in an easy fashion. Leaving trails of embers in every section of the city, there were no more mosquitoes. "Since you spoke, I though you would have at least human-level intelligence. But you were just a bug. You brought all the mosquitos together into one, easy-to-burn swarm. When I spotted you, I confirmed there were no living beings within 500 meters, so I should've been free to fire away. Wait, that guy might have- "

"Man, you saved me! You're amazing. What was that just now? You totally made them bug out! Get it? Since they're bugs." Before the other person could reply to his obvious joke, a familiar laugh echoed through their ears. "Idiot! I no longer need the tiny ones. I mean…look how strong I've become!" proving it to the blonde cyborg by tearing a building in half with the wind force of her attack. Letting out another maniacal laugh, Mosquito Girl rushed towards the cyborg too fast for any reaction. Using her talon to take a chunk off his stomach, she then refuted his counter-attack by sending him up into the air with a swift strike. Meeting his mechanical body in the air, she proceeded to mercilessly beat his body, ripping out wires and other parts on every hit. "What's wrong? Can't your punches kill a little mosquito?!" she ridiculed him.

_I see. The more blood she consumes the more powerful she becomes. I let my guard down. There's no chance of winning. All I can do is self-destruct. _

Saitama raised his hand and slapped the cyborg's assailant, sending her flying into a building, exploding on impact. Seeing as how the bald man just saved him, and how easily he did it, the cyborg couldn't control the gasp that came out his mouth.

"Mosquitos…suck!"

"Hold on! Please… tell me your name!"

"Oh, it's Saitama."

"I would like to be your disciple! My name is Genos!" Scratching his bald head, Saitama replied, "Oh, okay."

/

He knocked on the door of his newfound master, the one who would teach him how to be strong. Genos waited patiently before his sensei opened the door. "You really came…" Saitama said as if he was disappointed to see him. "Uh… Janos?" Shaking his head politely, Genos corrected him, "It's Genos, Saitama-sensei."

"Can you not call me sensei?"

"Master!"

"Not master either!"

After a long debate about whether his title to Genos be Saitama-sensei or simply Saitama, Genos settled on the former, despite protest from Saitama-sensei. "Go on home after this drink. I'm not looking for disciples. Wait- you're back in one piece?" Nodding his head, Genos confirmed, "Yes, my body is mostly mechanical. As long as there are parts, repairs are quick."

"You're an odd one."

Eager to know, Genos asked, "Sensei, what type of pieces do you use?"

"Me? I don't use any. That's my skin."

Holding his chin in place with his hand, Genos questioned, "But that would mean you're bald despite being so young."

Obviously, a sensitive subject for the hero for fun, he screamed, "So I'm bald! What's your problem?!"

"My problem? You would listen to my story?"

"No thanks, I'm ok."

"four years ago, when I was 15, I was still a real human being. Although we had to pinch pennies, my family and I lived a peaceful and happy life. But one day, a crazy cyborg went out of control and attacked our town. The insane cyborg, most likely a failed body modification generated an irregularity in his brain. He destroyed everything in sight. Parks, schools, buildings, my house. He even took my family's lives. Miraculously, I survived, but being only a weak 15-year-old, I was alone and at the end of my strength in a ruined town. That's when doctor Kuseno happened to pass through. Doctor Kuseno, a scientist for justice, was on a mission to stop the rampaging cyborg. I asked Doctor Kuseno to perform body modification on me. That's how I was reborn as a cyborg who fights for justice. I promised the Doctor that one day I would terminate that evil cyborg."

Taking a sip of his tea, Saitama sympathized with Genos. Being alone at such a young age was a hurtful and traumatizing thing. "I see- "

"It's been four years since that day. I'm now 19 and I've been wandering from town to town eliminating evil. The number of monsters and criminal organizations I have destroyed are too many to count. But I have been unable to find any clues about the mad cyborg and have become increasingly frustrated and restless. I find myself chasing a virtual image of that cyborg whenever I face off against my opponents. Then last week, when that mosquito monster appeared, I let my concentration slip. I was convinced I couldn't lose to anything but the rampaging cyborg, so I neglected to even analyze the data on my opponent and rushed to confront her, the result, as you know, was that an opponent with immense strength bested me. If you, Master Saitama, had not been in the area, I would've been undoubtably destroyed. Master… you saved my life. My life that was once saved by Doctor Kuseno has now been saved again by you, Saitama-sensei. I feel the weight of that responsibility. I must not die before destroying that cyborg. And to do that, I must continue fighting evil as a righteous cyborg until he appears before me one day. I need to get stronger. Last week, when I saw your punch, I knew I had to study under you as your disciple. If only I could be as strong as you, Master Saitama! I have an old enemy to defeat, and the battle is not for me only. It's for my hometown and for Doctor Kuseno too. I realize I am still inexperienced. But right now, I need enormous power so I can eradicate the greatest of evils! Doctor Kuseno is- "

"ENOUGH, YOU IDIOT! SHORTEN IT TO 20 WORDS OR LESS!"

"Master here's the short version: Teach me how to strong like you."

/

**SELF PROCLAIMED HERO SAVES THE DAY!**

**SELF PROCLAIMED HERO SAVES RANK-1 TERRIBLE TORNADO?**

Contrary to popular belief, fame was unbearable. For Blank, who essentially lived the life of a hermit, he didn't need all this attention on him. He had to wear glasses and a trench coat to work every day. Of course, the job interviewer found it strange, but it was a fast food place, background checks were basically non-existent. Constantly, Blank juggled between hero duty and common jobs, he had to get payed somehow. Looking to the door as the bell rang, Blank greeted the customer, "Hello! Welcome to McDonald's, how may I- "the 'customer' was wearing a shirt from the hero association and had a business card in his shirt pocket. Sighing, Blank asked, "What do you want?" The worker replied, "I need you to come to the headquarters of the hero association. There's well… a problem." Deciding to take him up on the offer, Blank followed him into a black limousine. Throwing off his fast food apron, he then asked the man, "What's the problem?" Shaking his head, the worker declined to answer.

/

"So… you're the hero we've been hearing about huh?"

"Well, yes and no. I'm the person you've been hearing of, but I'm no hero. Besides, even if I was, I'm a self-proclaimed one. I thought we were weirdos who spouted nonsense to be viewed with suspicion?"

Wiping sweat off his forehead, the worker replied, "Well yes, but no one can look past the fact that you saved THE Tatsumaki. She's been demanding to see you as well."

Slouching in his seat, he wondered what the man meant by 'see him'. "Listen, I've got too many problems, ok? I can't go around playing hero ALL day. I've got money to make, you know?"

"35 million. That's your annual pay, plus the donations from the public."

"When can I start?"

Inclined to continue after seeing a spark in Blank's eye's, the worker told him, "Well that's if you get into S-Class. We've decided that we want to broadcast your test to the rest of the world. The public has been dying to know about you."

"Sure, but my apartment's kind of far from here. So-"

"Worry not, Mr. Blank. We have a place for you in Y-City. Here's the keys and address number."

"Uh sure."

"We'll be looking forward to conducting business with you, next week, Mr. Blank."

"Uh… sure."

Getting up from his seat, he wondered what he could do with that much yen. Buy unlimited Bubble Tea? Yes, that was it. For now, though, he had to look for his new house.

/

He got there. His new house! It was everything he imagined. Well, besides the color. But that's fine, he could always repaint it. Juggling the keys around, he found the right one and opened the door. And at that moment, he understood why the house looked so green. It was because… it wasn't HIS house. Laying on the bed, sound asleep, was the Rank-1 Hero, Tatsumaki.

_What._

_The._

_Fuck._


	3. Omake 1

A/N

Going to take a small break (a week or two) from writing any more chapters for this story as it is currently Spring Break for me. But after it's over, I will be back to posting every Saturday or so. In the meanwhile, enjoy the Omake!

Blank's Fast Food Job. (Nothing in this omake is canon to the story.)

"Mmm… Can I get the fries?"

Blank looked at the man. He was dressed up in yellow and wore red boots and gloves. Having a bald head didn't help the man's case either. Part of Blank questioned how he lost his hair at such a young age, and the other part wondered how anyone's fashion sense could be so terrible. "Uh… would you like the small or large?" Looking at the picture of the fries on the menu again, the man told him, "I'll take a small." "Okay, 153 yen please." Taking the money, the man asked, "Oh, and can you make sure they put lots of soft, long ones?" Nodding, Blank told the people in the back of the man's request. Personally, Blank was more of a short, crispy fry guy.

About 5 minutes passed, and the fries were ready. Holding the tray of fries, Blank inspected it to find out it only had one long fry. After calling the customer who ordered it over, they also looked at the tray for a few seconds before nonchalantly taking it. Walking away, that was the end of it. Or so Blank thought, as a few minutes later, the same customer called him over to his table. His complaint was that his only long fry had been stolen. A single fry. Looking at him with a confused look, Blank asked him, "Oh... would you like to speak to the manager?" A moment of silence passed before the man told him, "Nah it's fine."

Finally, after 10 minutes the man exited the fast food restaurant. Someone followed closely behind, his body looking mostly mechanical. Although it was probably his imagination, he could swear he was holding a bag with a single long fry.

/

Never had he seen such a strange group, all with such strange hair colors, and all seemed to be as muscular as the most perfect Greek statue. A group of men, one seeming to be in his 60's, and the others being in their teenage years/early twenties were looking at the menu. The man in a green shirt went up to him, "Can I get 6 cheeseburgers, and an ice cream cone for me?" Nodding, Blank went to enter the order into the computer before another man with white hair that rose above his head interrupted him. "What?! We agreed that we would get burgers for the 6 of us! We don't have enough money to get you the ice cream." "I apologize but cherries are my favorite!" Blank had gotten customers like this all the time, people who would enter the store without knowing what they even wanted, and once they did, they'd argue over it for minutes inside the store. This time, though, it seemed as if the two of them were preparing to fight. One of the members of the group, characterized by a black jacket and a hat that had an O and a square with a hand inside it went to Blank to confirm the order. Handing him 2000 yen, the man audibly sighed, "Good grief. Just give us the 6 burgers." Sending the order to the back, Blank asked the man for his name. He replied, "Just write down Jojo."

What a bizarre group.


End file.
